A Shocking Lesson

Today I had some nerve conduction testing done on my hands, it sucked. Big time. I knew at the beginning of the week that I would have either an EMG or nerve conduction testing, or both. Liking to be prepared in advance, I looked up both tests so I would not be surprised. At first, I did not want to research the tests. I thought it would only cause me to worry about them. When I read the information, I was not too excited to find out needles would be involved in one of the tests. See...me and pain, not a good combination.

In the back of my mind most of the week I was thinking/worrying about the tests. I could tell I was worrying about something too because I felt sick all week. Fast forward to today. I knew worrying about the tests would not help. But in the end, I'm glad I did my homework. I think I would have been more stressed out if I did not know what I was going into.

So, two lessons from my fun-filled day:
1. Do your research so you can be prepared about whatever you're going into.
2. Once you do that research, don't worry about it. Worrying will not help you prepare for whatever you are about to face.

Helpful Advice

Here is some helpful advice from a Boston psychologist Dr. Endlich that helps to put things into perspective.

Attack the worry with the following questions:

• What's the worst thing that could happen?
• Although I don't want it to happen, could I survive it? How?
• How likely is it that my worst fear will happen?
• What proof do I have?
• What else might happen instead?
• What are some of the possible good outcomes?
• What has happened in similar situations in the past?
• Of all the times I've worried, what percentage of the time have my worries come true?
• When my fears did come true, what did I gain by worrying ahead of time?

Worrying is:

• paying interest on a debt you may never owe...
• and suffering in an imaginary life while the real one passes you by.

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Side note....while searching for some fun ways to get rid of worry I came across this site that suggested porn about 15 times in the article. I guess if you were really worried and stumbled across that site you would be able to laugh it away.

Laughter is key

Here are some cartoons that I found this week. Just some fun to remind us that although we face worry, stress, or anxiety sometimes we have to find some humor in the situation. We just have to learn how to laugh- this helps to lighten the situation. Don't forget to laugh!

Maybe we can talk to the purchasing department...I'm sure we can squeeze this into the budget.

Learn how to delegate...why didn't I think of that? You can just worry for me!

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Keep this quote in mind when you start to worry:

"Only man clogs his happiness with care, destroying what is with thoughts of what may be." -John Dryden

Move Past Self-Doubt

I Googled "worry" and found some interesting sites. Most of these sites were about how to overcome worry and anxiety. Some boasted worry quotes while others mentioned who/what should be worried. I skipped over anything negative and discovered some worry quotes that really spoke to me. The following quote is one of the stronger in the bunch:

Let us be of good cheer, remembering that the misfortunes hardest to bear are those which will never happen. ~ James Russel Lowell

It struck me because no matter how something turns out in the end, we usually imagine the worst possibility and let that fear choke us. Most often, we get so consumed with this dread; we cannot consider a better alternative. I must admit, I am a repeat offender. In the past, I have worked myself up into such a state where not much could calm me down. Why do we do these things to ourselves?

Web MD acknowledges that some worry/anxiety is healthy and beneficial. However, when we become overwrought, it can be disabling. I experienced a few panic attacks last year and they were awful. Looking back, I can attribute these attacks to the stress I had constantly dealt with throughout the semester. All of the stress ate away at me and left me vulnerable. During that Christmas break, when I tried to relax was when they hit.

I never want to feel that way again. That is why I'm working on worrying less, and I hope you will join me. Let us take into consideration the words of the wise Mr. Lowell (an American poet, critic, editor, and diplomat) the next time we are filled with self-doubt.

Jonesing

Things have the tendency to pile up. Tasks, homework, you name it. I have found myself experiencing this far too many times than I would care to admit. The most recent for me- another disorder to add to my list. I am the lucky new owner of carpal tunnel in not one but two (count them two!) wrists. Seriously? Seriously.

I'm sure I can thank my technologically inclined major, coursework, activities, and jobs. The one thing I was sure to mention while in the doctor's office- I need them back so I can go back to work/school. When I share my diagnosis with people outside of this field- I am told such things as "you're too young to have that." Anyone in this industry can understand the twisted commitment to the field and jonesing to get back to what I love.

I could worry about how long it will take me to get my hands back to semi-full functioning. But, I think I am going to get back to watching the Grammy's before I go to bed. See what a great trade-off that is? You should try it sometime.

Three Strikes

I worry about other people. I worry all the time about what other people do and need and what can I do to help? This has become a problem in my life. More often than not, my urge to help other people comes back to bite me. And the most recent instance- has caused a rift in my life that continues to grow. It's apparent I should stop caring about others. Not entirely. But maybe institute a "three strike policy." So I can begin to worry less about people who will only end up abusing me (that will only cause me to worry and become upset even more).

This last time I was talking to a couple people about what to do. Both agreed it was something I should not worry about. They asked me why I was so upset about someone who obviously does not want my advice and even when I did give it- I was accused of tearing that person down. So that is that. New changes will start today. It will take some getting used to be some people are a lost cause. Some people are supported by choosing ignorance and unpreparedness over experience and reason.

Less worry, less stress, less frustration. I am washing my hands of situations like these. A new perspective on how to help others. It is similar to what a professor I had once said- "I will only put in as much effort as you do." If you are not willing to help yourself, then there is no reason I should worry about finding a way to help you.

Batter up!

Keep Breathing

Last Friday, I had a routine dermatology appointment. As I sat in the room waiting for the doctor to come in, I debated on whether I should mention this mole that came on pretty quickly. You know those conversations you have with yourself in your head? I kept telling myself it was not a big deal and to stop. Still waiting, I eventually decided I would just mention it towards the end of the appointment- like an afterthought. No big deal.

She looked at it with her funky looking microscope/light that made me feel like one of the film strips I've studied in photography classes. She said it looked fairly normal. Whew! Then she compared it to others and took into consideration how quickly it developed and its size. She decided that she should remove it- just to be sure. She would call in about ten days with the results. As it turns out, I am glad she played it safe.

Since I am working on the whole worry free lifestyle (have not perfected it yet!), thinking about the results was shuffled to the back of my mind. When they called today, I missed it and they left a message asking me to call back. The first thing that popped into my mind was: “oh no! Why would they need me to call if everything was not ok?” Decided to knock it off and went to class. They eventually called me later in the afternoon. She told me that there were abnormal cells in the biopsy but they “got it all.” Breathing easier, I shared the great news. There will be more caution practiced in the future with any concerns about skin changes. For now, I am thanking God for the blessing and working to keep in that positive light.

Stepping back, I know that worrying about the results would have just added more stress to my life and would not have helped me speed up the process of waiting. Nothing but living in the moment would have helped me get to this point. It may sound stupid because these thoughts so simple. Once you reach that point where your life has gone out of your realm of control, simple is what works. Keep that in mind - something we learn when we are young (and in my psychology research classes): KISS = Keep It Simple Stupid. That can be more powerful than you could imagine. Next time, we can talk about going to therapy later for calling yourself stupid all the time. :)